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We are Done. Breaking up with Dating Apps.


Here is my resignation that some poor sucker who just received after asking me to spoon 18 hour ago:

Is this how dating is and I just need to accept that this is how dating is? Your tactics are weak. Your confidence is bold because you are texting messages to a stranger in a phone. It isn’t just you it is all men. I apologize that I am only sending this to you right now because, You seem like a nice guy and it is more than just you with this viewpoint. But seriously if I look over our conversation, why should I say yes to that? At least you are only asking to spoon, but why?! Why would I jump for joy that a guy wants to press his body against mine after 18 poorly exchanged messages over 7 months? I think I am officially done with app dating. This is a joke. I am sending in my resignation to you, a poor in expecting victim who just happens to be trying to move forward in dating, put himself out there with poor tactics and is receiving the back lash of some girl’s years of frustration with the way dating has become. Reevaluate your tactics. Seriously, best of luck out there. Hope you find what you’re looking for and you probably will.

I have been dating for almost 16 years now and let’s just face the facts it sucks. I have had what I thought to be an undwindling optimism and never ending hope. Blah blah blah… I still have that but not for app dating we are through. I am breaking up with app dating. 
In the future when people ask me about being single and they ask if I have tried an certain app or another my response will be yes and it is the worst.
I think I will split this post into segments and demonstrate how it is the worst. I might have some guest authors and ask them to share their experiences. (Reach out to me if you’d like to participate. Females and males welcome. Sucky dating isn’t one sexs fault.) Also, I will edit out the yoo-hoo’s face and name and share the screen shots of this exact experience and several others. Stay tuned in to see if I get a “bitter woman” or a stream of profanities response. Until next post, good day.

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A Year with Krystal Dey


Yesterday, I woke up to this notification not like I need any notifications to remember my little sister’s birthday. She herself is a walking talking notification. You don’t need a push banner or dinging alerts when it comes to the most important day of her life, her birthday! I admire how she celebrates the small things and the large things; to the fullest.

That is not all that I admire about her, so I am going to dedicate this blog to her and it mostly will be a photo log of a year with Krystal Dey.

Please see the detailed list of birthday plans below:

Krystal’s Birthday plans

 

  • Food is important to her. (It is impressive how much of her plans consisted of food.)
  • She is hilarious on Twitter. Even funnier than me and I crack myself up.

  • She makes the best faces. She found someone to join in on the face making.

Provo City Center Open House

SnapChat

Caught in a Yawn

Krystal and Robert At the Temple Open House

  •  She sends me the best motivation and information on snapchat.

I sent her a snap of me laughing, other’s responded “creepy” not Krystal though

Snap from when I was traveling , no sure where though

Snap update

  • She loves dogs.

Scooter and Krystal

Just a dalmation

 

  • She attends things with me. (Being the single lady that I am, it is nice to be able to count out someone to accompany me out and about.)

Britney’s Baby Shower

Hanging out with Matt

Amber and Landon’s wedding

Chealsea’s bridal shower

  •  She takes care of me.

Post Mountian Biking

  • She lets me hang out.

 Her Kind Texts

  • She is always working on her fitness. Impressively, she encourages others to do so too without being pushy or over bearing. Somehow I ran a 5k with her and Robert, I swore I would never…(please see the Second picture, I am not pictured because I believe I am lying in a hammock trying not to die.)

Snaps about fitness and pants

Post 5k photo

  • She is always down for shenanigans and adventures.

CCC / POW Camp

Punking Karli

Camping in Maplegrove

  • She always wanted to match me. (Well news flash Krystal, we will always match. We are just twins separated by four years.)

Faceswapping

The day we wore the same sweater

The day we wore the same sweater

The day we wore the same sweater

And I couldn’t be more flattered and proud to be so matching with someone so amazing, intelligent, funny, emotionally mature, and beautiful as her.

  • She makes me feel comfortable to be me. I don’t mind being third or even fifth wheel.

Krystal and Robert waitting. for Karli to call

Betos 5th wheeling

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Krystal and Robert modeling for me on our trip to Vernal

 

Dinner date with these delightful two


  • She is great at celebrating good times, like I said.

4th of July 2015

Fernando’s Graduation

My Birthday

So let me celebrate her and the joy she brings to my life with some past birthday memories:


She is the best and not only does this blog prove that but it can be used as a catch up for that litter one out on her mission. Karli will be like, “so sister s what have you been up to?” And Krystal, we can be like here ready this post. It is what we call a two for one deal.

But I think this past birthday post sums up how I feel about my sister the best:

Joy Thief

We have all heard the quote from Theodore Roosevelt : Comparison is the Thief

We all also have been guilty of this. “Comparison is the thief of joy.” We allow other people’s joy take away from ours by comparing. Think about a time you have done this in the past. Why do we do this?

It is so easy to look at someone else’s life and wonder about yours. This is something I think that social media makes so easy.  I have been guilty of this lately and today without hesitation, I delete Facebook and Instagram off my phone.  (Just off my phone not permanently, I am not fake running away.) It is time to refresh, TeAnna.  Time to count my blessings.

I still blog

I need you to know I still blog, I just haven’t blogged in a while. I am sorry, I have probably lost all of you, my blog followers, please come back. please…..

Where are my Mourners at?

Where are my Mourners at? This one is for you!

“Yea, and are willing to mourn with those that mourn…” That is a phrase I have heard before. (For an exact reference please check Mosiah 18:9) This phrase is more than something I have heard before, it is something I have made a covenant to keep. But regardless of my religious choices and commitments, I think it explains my desire to always mourn with those that mourn.

Losing someone sucks. I don’t even have a desire to put that more poetically or with better terminology. It sucks. If anything sucks, death sucks! I wish that nobody had to experience the loss of a loved one. (Realistically, I understand that would mean we would all live forever, in order for that to happen.) Since that is not possible, we will all lose someone at some point, but I wish it didn’t have to happen.

I have lost. My heart broke. It hurt. It hurts. Still.

For my Mourners, I hear your stories and it happens all over again. I lose, my heartbreaks, it hurts and hurts and still hurts.

Oh, where is the hope and where is the point of this TeAnna? (Ask away, I myself am asking.) There is a point. We go through it for each other. We go through pain to remember the joy. We lose in order to draw closer to those we are left with. We have experience in order to help those with similar experience.

Nine and a half years ago, I lost my mom. Since loosing my best friend, I have notice that I am not the only one who has lost. (I realized it before that but I never understood the way I do now.) When I see that someone I know and care about has lost someone they love, my heart breaks for them.

Let me list some of what hurts me for my mourners:

  • the shock and pain of the initial loss (the worst)
  • the remembering of the last moment with the individual (the should have been’s or if only’s)
  • the realization of the times that will now be missed out on (the could of been’s)
  • the putting on a face and taking care of business (the necessary bravery, that is strangely empoweringly painful, you never wanted to be this strong)
  • the floods of sympathy (they are comforting and wonderful and necessary but painful)
  • the moment the sympathy ends (you don’t realize exactly when it happens but the day comes when people stop saying sorry)
  • the fact that everyone else continues on with their lives (how dare they?! yet you will too)
  • the stages of grief
  • needing to go through the stages of grief
  • the distancing people do when they don’t know how to handle your loss
  • the identifier of being someone who has lost
  • the effort to loose the identifier of being someone who has lost but realizing it is so much of a part of who you are, that it is a rightly an identifier
  • the moment when years pass and subconsciously you still reach out to contact the person you’ve lost only to remind yourself of your loss
  • the fact people tell you it gets better (and you realize you don’t want it to get better. But the truth is it does and it doesn’t)
  • the cycles of sadness that accompany birthdays and holidays

Okay stop already TeAnna!! This is too depressing. You said you would mourn with me not mourn for me or make the saddest list in the world! You are right, blog readers, you are absolutely right. This is just some of the things that I feel, remember, and worry about for you. We will all go through something that is uniquely us. We will mourn in our own way and time. But upon hearing about your loss I think about these and I worry about you.

I also know that in the beginning there is going to be a strength that will guide you through those dark days. I know that returning to those initial feelings of comfort will help you. I know that surrounding yourself with loved ones and memories, you will find the pain easing. You will feel a sense of understanding. I also, ask you to reach out. Reach out to those who have gone through similar situations and allow those who are reaching out to help you.

I will forever mourn with those who mourn. It is now part of who I am. I am here for you. Whatever you need I am here.

Oh yeah, and watch Big Hero 6

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I haven’t Blogged in a while….

It has been a while since I have blogged. I have been living too much to blog. Is that possible? Ahh, more like I have chosen other things to do rather than blog. Here is a test blog to get the bloggings out there before they hit you full force.

18 Ugly Truths About Modern Dating That You Have To Deal With

Thought Catalog

Celeste and Jesse Forever [Blu-ray]Celeste and Jesse Forever

1. The person who cares less has all the power. Nobody wants to be the one who’s more interested.

2. Because we want to show how cavalier and blasé we can be to the other person, little psychological games like ‘Intentionally Take Hours Or Days To Text Back’ will happen. They aren’t fun.

3. A person being carefree because they have zero interest in you looks exactly like a person being carefree because they think you’re amazing & are making a conscious effort to play it cool. Good luck deciphering between the two.

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4. Making phone calls is a dying art. Chances are, most of your relationship’s communication will happen via text, which is the most detached, impersonal form of interaction. Get familiar with those emoticon options.

5. Set plans are dead. People have options and up-to-the-minute updates on their friends (or other potential…

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BTW: Broke That Window

By The Way, my little sister and I came up with another use of BTW: Broke That Window. We use it in the situations where someone shatters someone else’s reality with perspective changing information. I think it is perfect for so many uses.

Two Examples:

  • Girl has crush on guy, best friend tells girl he is gay. Broke That Window
  • Friend has been mispronouncing a word, and friend informs them of correct pronunciation. Broke That Window

Now it is story time. My life had an amazing BTW experience  21 years ago. Karli was born. I never knew such an inspiring human being could exist. Well she does. My perspective changed because of her, and probably always will.  I remember the Christmas dress I wore, and singing in the bank. I was so excited for the season, but most of all excited for the big change I knew was coming. She broke a window, changed my life, and blessed my life so much. Happiest Birthday Wishes little sis.  BTW, (most widely accepted usage) That is all for now.

Unexpected Friendship

Unexpected Friendship- Is that a good title for this blog? I am not sure because I did expect this friendship. I knew instantaneously, we would be friends, yet, I did not know how good of friends we would be.
(Oh well, that shall be the title.)
This story starts a hot day in Brazil. (It rarely isn’t a hot day in Brazil, so good luck narrowing down the day by that clue.) It was an afternoon where in a break was taken by two Portuguese talking Americans girls in mid-calf length skirts who wore odd mini-backpacks. There was a thrift shop and street that lead to Ester’s house. Try as the gringas could they always stood out, the thick accent on the one and the super blonde hair on the other made it impossible for anyone to not notice the American girls. Many wondered why they were here and some asked.
Of that some Fernando’s Aunt was one, who did ask. She knew her fourteen year old nephew would be even more intrigued by these foreigners.
You see I was one of these foreigners, I was the one with the thick accent and the really long pony tail that went down her back resting atop my weird little backpack. It was the end of the twenty-fourth year of my wonderful life and I craved to share something I love so dearly with the world. I had been sharing the message of the restored gospel for sixty-eighth weeks in a several cities in Brazil all of which were located in the State of Sao Paulo in the north western country side. I was nearing the end of my mission and delaying the thoughts of returning home. Although my family was always a great sore aching pain in my heart, I covered that with the aching love I had to share the gospel with all that I met.
Fernando’s Aunt told us about him. I thought it odd as we explained what we were doing that here in Brazil, she thought of him. I couldn’t see why she herself didn’t want to meet with us. But as she spoke of Fernando, I thought there probably would come success from her reference, at least a visit with a young man fascinated with countries. We didn’t make a plan to meet with him. We just rushed off to Ester’s house.
As everything happened, I felt a connection to Fernando and his family that seemed as if I had always known them.
I am not sure if that has happened to you ever, but it has surely happened to me. This wasn’t the first time in Brazil, but it was the strongest. I immediately felt the role of Fer’s older sister was one that I was meant to play. I am not sure how to explain it but here is an example; I remember a few weeks into meeting Fernando I was sitting at in a seat at my place of worship, next to a person who was studying our form of worship, when a member of the congregation suggested I sit next to Fernando who was also there. I grudgingly yet with love, like an older sister would, moved next to him. Thinking, he can sit where he is he choose the spot he is in, it was just different with him.
For tonight that is all this story will be, but trust me there is more. And it goes one to reveal an unexpected-expected friendship. Come back to find out more, but think about those connections in your life. Just do.