We are Done. Breaking up with Dating Apps.

Here is my resignation that some poor sucker who just received after asking me to spoon 18 hour ago:

Is this how dating is and I just need to accept that this is how dating is? Your tactics are weak. Your confidence is bold because you are texting messages to a stranger in a phone. It isn’t just you it is all men. I apologize that I am only sending this to you right now because, You seem like a nice guy and it is more than just you with this viewpoint. But seriously if I look over our conversation, why should I say yes to that? At least you are only asking to spoon, but why?! Why would I jump for joy that a guy wants to press his body against mine after 18 poorly exchanged messages over 7 months? I think I am officially done with app dating. This is a joke. I am sending in my resignation to you, a poor in expecting victim who just happens to be trying to move forward in dating, put himself out there with poor tactics and is receiving the back lash of some girl’s years of frustration with the way dating has become. Reevaluate your tactics. Seriously, best of luck out there. Hope you find what you’re looking for and you probably will.

I have been dating for almost 16 years now and let’s just face the facts it sucks. I have had what I thought to be an undwindling optimism and never ending hope. Blah blah blah… I still have that but not for app dating we are through. I am breaking up with app dating. 
In the future when people ask me about being single and they ask if I have tried an certain app or another my response will be yes and it is the worst.
I think I will split this post into segments and demonstrate how it is the worst. I might have some guest authors and ask them to share their experiences. (Reach out to me if you’d like to participate. Females and males welcome. Sucky dating isn’t one sexs fault.) Also, I will edit out the yoo-hoo’s face and name and share the screen shots of this exact experience and several others. Stay tuned in to see if I get a “bitter woman” or a stream of profanities response. Until next post, good day.

52 Things My Dad Taught Me in 52 Minutes

I am pretty sure he thought we were just talking. It is Thursday night after all. We have let too many Thursdays pass. Don’t let your Thursdays pass.

1. He taught me about about humility because none of what follows came out as bragging, boasting, or overly confident.

2. I learned the importance of kind words. I learned it through his kind words.

3. I heard respect in his voice, with the way he spoke to me, and through the way he spoke of others.

4. Service, “When you share with others you are blessed with things to share.” It was a motto while I was growing up but more than that it is a way of life for that man.

5. The importance of hard work. It just makes you feel better when you are doing something. Yes, it might be silly to do something just to cross something off your list. And maybe T, you just aren’t one of those task oriented folks that lives to accomplish the next task but enjoy the feeling of accomplishment.

6. Eat healthy. (You feel better when you do.)

7. Ambiance, your surroundings affect you mood.

8. What is the use of going out to eat with people you care about, if you can’t carry on a conversation in the noise restaurant?

9. If you don’t like where you are move.

10. On the other hand, if you do like where you are and things are going great, why change?

11. Moving isn’t always progression.

12. Family. (They are seriously the most important.) With story after story, I heard about the important people in his life who are the important people in my life. The examples and role models he spoke about are my grandparents, great grandparents, siblings, step-siblings, uncles, aunts, my mom, and my step-mom. Seriously, how can I be so blessed with great people in my life?

13. Return to your roots.

14. Follow the legacy of you those who came before you.

15. Record their stories.

16. Share their stories.

17. Care about their stories.

18. They are more a part of your life and who you are than you could ever know.

19. It is okay to miss them.

20. Talk about them.

21. Gather memories.

22. Reach out to the family you can.

23. T, you are lucky to have came from such a rich heritage.

24. The importance of timing.

25. Everything happens for a reason. You might think it is fate or coincidence but really you are where you are right now for some reason. What are you going to do about it? Why are you there?

26. Something that one person might be going through might be a big deal to that person, just because it isn’t a big deal for you.

27. Don’t judge.

28. Your  problems are smaller than they seem right now.

29. Take time to enjoy the good moments.

30. Reach out.

31. You might be smart, competent, and capable but that doesn’t mean you always should.

32. Follow your dreams, and share your dreams.

33. Sometimes the thing you are most worried about not being able to accomplish is the thing that is holding you back for a reason.

34. Figure out what things mean.

35. Protect the people you love.

36. Be prepared.

37. To truly care about someone you ask about that someone, learn the important little details of their life and then ask about that.

38. Garden.

39. Full filling civic duties will lead to a full life.

40. Find the value in the individual.

44. Find hobbies that make you happy, and keep up on them.

45. History is important. Learn about it. Engage yourself in it.

46. Inspire others to serve.

47. Look to the future. Plan thing out in the future. Look forward.

48. Friendship is key. Make sure they know they important roll they are in your life.

49. Laugh.

50. Cry, when it is needed.

51. Tell people you love them.

52. Show them, you love them.

Like I said, I am pretty sure he thought we were just talking. It is Thursday night after all. We have let too many Thursdays pass. Don’t let your Thursdays pass.

Skydiving Canyonlands

“Make sure my sister knows I loved her

Make sure my mother knows the same

Always remember, there is nothing worth sharing

Like the love that let us share our name

Always remember, there is nothing worth sharing

Like the love that let us share our name”

-The Avett Brothers

This is one of those stories I’ll tell until the day I jump out of that plane and forget that rip cord. (Or lying in my death bed, get it? …Until the day I die.) To morbid? Sorry, I am fine with it as you can see in this video clip, I verbally state my will but it is all a joke. Ever since we planned our death in CNA class, my own death is not a fear of mine.

Anyways, this will forever be one of my favorite life stories and I can not due it justice. Perhaps justice could be served if  Blake, Karli, and I gathered you around a kitchen table and described it in excruciating detail.  Great stories would be told. Catch phrases would be remembered. (It only takes 5 minutes. Schetch.)  The next best thing is this video clip.

Jumping out of this plane was seriously one of the best things I have ever done. (Not the best, one of the best.) It was the perfect mixture of amazing, thrilling, and peaceful. I was called a straight-up bad A, twice, from a  professional skydiver. The feeling falling towards earth, Oh and the view! I loved it.  Would I do it again. Yes. Would I sell everything I own and buy a parachute and do this everyday? Yeah, everyday.

Should I? Maybe, I am just glad I was able to share this adventure with good old Blake and my little sister Karli. She is a trooper. This one is for you, I love ya girl. (Thanks for the idea Blake, I might have stolen this from your “last words”.)

Just Observing

Just observing in my weekly worship services I noticed a pattern a theme to the discussion, lessons and talks. It sounded like everyone met together and figured out the perfect things for me to hear and collaborated to form the perfect day.  The only thing is I struggled not to think about fashion, I wanted to just talk to my friend, needless to say I was super distracted. I did however gather some of the amazingly inspirational greatness of the day.

This is what I  can share of what I learned to day: Reclaimed

The Mommy Diaries

The Mommy Diaries; to all you moms out there write them. When I was a baby my mom wrote to me, in her dairy. She described how she felt, what she was excited for and what was happening. Seriously, priceless!

The Mommy Dairies

8 years ago….

I loaded up two suit cases. I went to the airport. I met up with a group of people and boarded a plane to China. My family cried when they said goodbye. I am sure I did too. I had really never left, a junior college 40 minutes from my house is nothing in comparison to Asia. I was headed off with three roommates from college. One of whom had convinced me in the first place, to go to the interview. The children’s faces in the photos convinced me this was a great idea.

I remember L.A. We held on to our bags like nervous traveling Americans. We found our gate. Our layover was long. Our head teacher took some motion sickness pills, knowing the long flight that was a head. We left our bags with the sleepy version of him. We were antsy and wandered. McDonald’s was the meal I chose as my last meal in the United State, I am a fool. I sat down with two of the new people, I was headed out with. I remember her pink hoodie and question whether they were dating; they seemed like they knew each other well. I learn they too, had just met. The hilarious ginger, had made the right food choice with a large plate of Mexican food in front of him. ( Actually,  as I am typing this I question everything I believe and have believed in the past eight years, HELLO WORLD!!!  A large plate of Mexican food right before a 15 hour flight to China? How could I ever have thought that was a good idea?)  Sure, we never ate Mexican food in China, minus the chicken tacos we made in from the box my mom sent, but still I just can fathom eating that before take off.

Anyways, nothing will match the feeling of that day. I was excited, nervous, and happy. No matter what I’ll never be who I was before I left for China again. I’ll never be that confidant, innocent, wide eyed girl headed out to see the world. China changed me. And I am glad I it did, I am glad I let it. Forever more I would be that confidant, innocent wide eye girl who hungers to see the world.

Seriously, this is only in here because it was our trip from the airport to or new apartments. Check out some of the differing faces, I think they express some of the differing emotions in this moment.

This just because. We were a team. (Negative one team mate but still a team.) A team who loved taking photos and a team who didn’t mind wearing track suits with restricting elastic on the ankle and wrist cuffs, as long as it was for unity of our team.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QW6Nk6Dpu6g

Secret Crush

My dear friend is responsible for this crazy video and I LOVE it!!! If any thing deserves to go viral online I think this does. He is the original hipster. He was hip before it was cool. I love it because it is so him and that makes me happy.

Anyways this song goes out to that special Secret Crush of mine. I might not even know who you are but I like this song.

Families that Play, Together Stay Together!

#gbnf Families that Play, Together Stay Together!

How Our Mustache Party Turned Out

I don’t even know this guy but I love his mustache. Follow this link to my sisters blog to see how the party turned out. http://www.krystaldey.com/2012/12/mustache-party-mmp2012.html

A Mormon Single Girl’s Guide to Surviving the Holidays

I know, I know, the holidays are over. But here is the truth, they just happened and I survived them. I should save this post and post it for next season. Being a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints is wonderful; being 28 and single can be awkward.  Here is my favorite way it is explained:

“The situation of a Church member who is single can be illustrated by a simple analogy. Imagine that your favorite hobby is stargazing and you’ve just joined a stargazing club. You come to your first club activity eager to participate. It’s a cold night, but you’re not concerned: most of the club members are wearing club jackets, and you’ve been told you should be able to get one as well. But there is no jacket for you. You ask about it, and you are told to keep looking and that if you do your best, you will find a jacket when the time is right.

Meanwhile, you are getting pretty cold and a little worried. And you notice that most of the other club members are talking about how nice and warm their jackets are. In fact, throughout the evening the topic surfaces continually in various forms: how to wash and dry your jacket, how to add extra pockets, how to mend it, and so forth. Some of the club members notice you don’t have a jacket. “You really need a jacket for these activities,” they tell you. “Why don’t you have one yet?”” Source

I feel like the holiday season is times were I am asked about “my jacket” the most. So here are a few ways I deal with it:

1. Travel in packs

Whenever possible bring other single friends along to those company parties or a friendly get together.  Show those “Marrieds” that there are others like you out there and it isn’t that strange.

2. Practice what to say

If you have a sassy comeback ready when someone ask you why you are still single you’ll be ready. 2012 Season favorite: “How many superheroes do you know who are married?”

3. Don’t hire out a love interest

Life isn’t a Hallmark Christmas movie, don’t fake or lie, own your singledom.

4. Try to understand

For some odd reason people feel really comfortable talking about the weather and pointing out people’s marital status. If it isn’t comfortable for you to talk about, veer the conversation elsewhere.

5. When all else fails, asks for advice and tune it out

I pull this one out only when I am most irritated by the “Marrieds” blatantly offensive comments. I simply ask what do you think I should be doing different. Usually response starts with “Flirt……” and ends with who knows what, I tuned them out remember. (Okay, truth be told I usually do listen and try to apply what they say because as irritated as I am, you never know what you are going to learn.)

And lastly,  number six comes from a personal rule…..as long as your single never say no to a blind date. Blind dates always make for an interesting  story whether it is at your 50th wedding anniversary or as you relate the tale back to friends about the epic fail, blind dates make for an interesting life.

source

Caution: If you click on this source you could be lost for hours laughing and lusting like I was. I love Ryan, remember this post? I swear there was a “Hey girl, Looking for your jacket?” And I wanted to post that one but this one works too. I just kept looking couldn’t find it anywhere, but I didn’t mind searching.